Chuck Norris Vs Segata Sanshiro

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July 4th, 2009 at 3:04 am -

Epic smackdown for America’s birthday. Can Norris defend his title?

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38 Comments

Jwlynas
July 4, 2009
#1

Oooh, tough match up.

Sadly for Norris, he doesn’t have his own kickass theme tune, nor do people explode when he throws them.

This match goes to Sanshiro!
Thepocalypse
July 4, 2009
#2

Norris slams a revolving door in his face and it’s all over.
Jwlynas
July 4, 2009
#3

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=joNwYPdEBTc

Please. You’re telling me this guy loses to chuck?

He jumped ontop of a missile meant for the Sega HQ and flew it into space. Years later, he returned to earth, and now lives amongst us once more.

Chuck norris attempts the roundhouse kick of doom. Segata Sanshiro catches his leg (A relatviely easy think to do with roundhouse kicks) and uses the momentum to launch Chuck into the distance. Cue Exploding.
Stardust
July 4, 2009
#4

Segeta, because Chuck Norris jokes gets old.
Tim
July 4, 2009
#5

Thanks for finally doing this one admin.

Segata Sanshiro owns Chuck Norris hard by throwing him, thus causing him to blow up in an explosion of pure ownage!
L-W
July 5, 2009
#6

A sixty year old, washed up B-movie actor against a fighter who seems to disregard most physical laws.
Albert Wikowonkavitz
July 5, 2009
#7

Segata Sanshiro wins because it doesn’t take hyperbole and jokes to make defy the laws of physics.
Jwlynas
July 5, 2009
#8

“A sixty year old, washed up B-movie actor against a fighter who seems to disregard most physical laws.”

Now which side are you rooting for here L-W?

The only difference if you’re playing by reality is that Segata Sanshiro (Hiroshi Fujioka) is still acting. Kamen Rider and Tomica Hero Rescue being his main roles.

Wikipedia is a wonderful thing sometimes…
Space marine
July 5, 2009
#9

Hmm, Norris vs Some Sageta?

Chuck could just shoot him with those Uzi’s.
Winner: Kharn teh betrayer.
JoshMcFace
July 5, 2009
#10

Segata, because I now have the theme tune in my head.
For some reason I also see throwing Chuck into the sun within his range of abilities.
Tim
July 5, 2009
#11

“A sixty year old, washed up B-movie actor against a fighter who seems to disregard most physical laws.”

This comment made me laugh quite a lot.
Pokezilla
July 5, 2009
#12

Chuck Norris wins quite obviously.
PaPPa JUDAS
July 5, 2009
#13

Segata Sanshiro may have his own theme song but did he have a cartoon http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vybSGMkqWbQ
L-W
July 5, 2009
#14

“The only difference if you’re playing by reality is that Segata Sanshiro (Hiroshi Fujioka) is still acting. Kamen Rider and Tomica Hero Rescue being his main roles.”

Segata Sanshiro is a character, Chuck Norris is an actor. Big difference.
PaPPa JUDAS
July 5, 2009
#15

“Chuck norris attempts the roundhouse kick of doom. Segata Sanshiro catches his leg (A relatviely easy think to do with roundhouse kicks) and uses the momentum to launch Chuck into the distance. Cue Exploding.”

Someone once told Chuck Norris that a Roundhouse Kick was not the most efficent way of killing someone shortly after he died of Roundhouse related injurys.
kniget
July 6, 2009
#16

chuck norris has a beard…nuff said….facial hair always wins over non facial hair
Dracosphinx
July 6, 2009
#17

most men’s left teste is larger than the right. Chuck Norris’ are eache bigger than the other.
cyborg pirate ninja jesus
July 6, 2009
#18

http://www.chucknorrisfacts.com

all that is chuck….this is why he is awesome
L-W
July 6, 2009
#19

I will not hesitate in killing the next person who quotes a Chuck Norris fact.
Space marine
July 6, 2009
#20

“I will not hesitate in killing the next person who quotes a Chuck Norris fact.”

Heh.

Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits. And so am I.
cyborg pirate ninja jesus
July 6, 2009
#21

chuck norris has no chin underneath the beard is just another fist
L-W
July 6, 2009
#22

I will make it a simple choice for you.

Hatchet to face.
PaPPa JUDAS
July 7, 2009
#23

“I will not hesitate in killing the next person who quotes a Chuck Norris fact.”

When the BogieMan goes to bed he checks his closet for Chuck Norris

Chuck Norris’s cowboy boots are made from REAL COWBOYS

Chuck Norris can swallow a rubiks cube and poop it out SOLVED

Thats 3 L-W plus the one before your ultimatum come and get me HAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAH
Space marine
July 7, 2009
#24

I choose…..Um……Hatchet to the face?
Diana
July 7, 2009
#25

Racism is the number one factor that Chuck Norris wins on this thread…
L-W
July 7, 2009
#26

That and the fact that most people under the age of twenty-one are idiots.
cyborg pirate ninja jesus
July 7, 2009
#27

norris smash
http://87.106.7.69/ready23/bilder/ChuckHulk.jpg
Baron Somebody
July 7, 2009
#28

When Chuck Norris does push ups, the earth doesn’t push him up, he pushes the Earth down

Chuck Norris doesn’t read, he stares at books until they give him the information he wants out of fear

Frost doesn’t bite Chuck Norris, Chuck Norris bites frost

Chuck Norris doesn’t get wet, water gets Chuck Norris

Ha ha ha ha ha L-W there is nothing you can do about it…oh and I will meet your hatchet with a hatchet of my own and a giant rusty wrench…
Jwlynas
July 7, 2009
#29

“chuck norris has a beard…nuff said….facial hair always wins over non facial hair”

Only in the case of Rock bands. In hand to hand combat, it merely gives a dirty fighter something to grab hold of.

Segata Sanshiro Wins this.
Bombshell
July 7, 2009
#30

Segeta Sanshiro is the ultimate predecessor to Kenshiro from Hokuto No Ken,
NUFF SAID.
Space marine
July 8, 2009
#31

Seriously, Won’t The Squinty eye’s be killed once he is shot by a gun?
PaPPa JUDAS
July 9, 2009
#32

Racism is the number one factor that Chuck Norris wins on this thread…

What ???? untill post 31 I hadn’t noticed any
Ristar
August 4, 2009
#33

Chuck wins by default, because Segata died in the last commercial.
Envoy
August 25, 2009
#34

Chuck Norris is the reason why Waldo is hiding.

Chuck Norris counted to infinity – twice.

Chuck Norris doesn’t wear a watch, HE decides what time it is.

using these fact’s we can all decide, and agree that Chuck Norris is the winner even if he wasnt fighting, battle over is there a factpile award for this section if so I vote Chuck Norris the winner.
Shovelman
October 16, 2009
#35

Yeah, Chuck Norris loses because he’s actually tired of the superficial list of Chuck norris facts. Since he litterally rejects these fabrications. The difference between Sanshiro and Norris is Sanshiro has demonstrated himself [as far as fiction goes] where as Norris facts are just without merit.

Sanshiro wins, oh and btw he has his own theme song and commercial devoted to a game based on him. Also he has a multitiude of short clones.

All further Norris Quotes will only tarnish your reputation and intellegence further. Have a nice day.
Silly@AionGuide
January 2, 2010
#36

Should be a nice match!
jay666
March 9, 2010
#37

chuck norris only owns one callendar and every month is chucktober.

bruce lee did not beat chuck norris that fight was the result of the most expensive special effects ever

chuck norris never won an award for his acting
jay666
March 9, 2010
#38

HE ISN’T ACTING