Ever have low expectations of a film and then when you finally watched it you were pleasantly surprised?
Well, that didn’t happen here.
Let me first say that I thought the acting, directing, CGI were all excellent.
Too bad the story felt bloated and forced, and the worst part was, the villain was just flat out BORING.
I understand that since this was the “origin” story that we have to yet again learn about Poor Peter Parker and his pathetic family life, and his relation to what’s her name.
Of course, we also have to watch as he learns how to use his powers. SNORE.
I know that this is a super hero movie and I am supposed to suspend my disbelief, But one thing that really bothered me was this – Peter Parker is supposed to be really smart – but he used BING for his searches? BULLSHIT. No one uses Bing except for the idiots who haven’t figured out that you can use the web not using internet explorer.
That told me that he was a friggin lucky dipshit with powers – (Oh, by the way, apparently, anyone can get them, just get bitten by a special spider) LAME.
And then all the lizards (IN NEW YORK FUCKING CITY, since you know, it’s like Florida where Geckos run everywhere.) I’ve been to NYC over a dozen times in my life, during the summer and have yet to see a GODAMN FUCKING LIZARD.
Oh, and those lizards that Peter saw? OF COURSE they crawl towards the sewer (Which is where this movie belongs) AMAZING! Shouldn’t BING have told him that?
I hate to slam a movie because it takes talented people to put these together and so I blame this entirely on the screenwriters. They had an easy villain with predictable outcomes and blah, blah, blah, Spider-Man has to save the day.
I’m sure this movie will easily make over 200 Million at the box office, since people love Spider-Man and put their fanboy blinders on when watching it.
I already know that Dark Knight Rises will be better, and that’s just from watching the trailers.
5/10.
Anyone else sit through this crap? Share your thoughts below!
This sounds way too much like Expert.
This isn’t a review. It’s a rant.
I agree with Sorrow, except if it were Expert the review would be filled with comments about how shitty Factpile has become and another call for him to run the site.
‘This sounds way too much like Expert.’
Indeed.
“I agree with Sorrow, except if it were Expert the review would be filled with comments about how shitty Factpile has become and another call for him to run the site.”
-
It just seems too out of character for admin to word a review like this.
Can I get a second opinion before I make a decision about seeing this movie?
I think my biggest beef with the movie is that it feels the need to re-tell the story (which at this point it doesn’t). I guess in a way I can understand because it wants to separate itself from the other Spider-man movies.
” except if it were Expert the review would be filled with comments about how shitty Factpile has become and another call for him to run the site.”
__
What, Expert tried to take over the site or something?
“What, Expert tried to take over the site or something?”
-
He is the self-proclaimed King of Factpile.
“What, Expert tried to take over the site or something?”
-
www.factpile.com/4385-expert-zone-why-factpile-sucks/
-
www.factpile.com/6604-expert-zone-factpile-still-sucks/
@Itchy
Nice links xD Did he always cry so much? Good thing he seems to have gone then huh.
“Nice links xD Did he always cry so much? Good thing he seems to have gone then huh.”
-
Yes, he had this fetish for trying to be controversial and “above” everyone else. He is Negative’s predecessor and (probably) his mentor.
It was a good movie, Xeno Dimentio. People are only annoyed about showing the origin of Spiderman. You’ll probably enjoy it.
I plan on watching it tonight, loved the previews, and I honestly think it looks amazing. That and web-shooters, finally some web-shooters
If this review wasn’t done by Expert, I’d be highly surprised. This is his exact way of speaking.
@Admin
when are you gonna give us a magic mike review
===
as for this thread im going to go see spidey on saturday
It was pretty slow-rolling in between the fight scenes and web travel. But I like Uncle Ben deaths in any incarnation so that got me to the end.
Just saw it and I like it better than the last ones. I totally recommend it.
-
As for Peter using bing and Internet explorer…that’s obvious advertising so you can’t say he’s and idiot for that. He seemed pretty smart to me. He figured out what his dad was working on without much of an explanation and he modified the web shooters so theyd actually shoot the web instead of just spooling it out. I sincerely doubt the writer of this rant could do either of those things.
-
Bottom line the movie isn’t on the same level as movies like LOTR but it’s definitely worth seeing.
Just saw it and I like it better than the last ones. I totally recommend it.
-
As for Peter using bing and Internet explorer…that’s obvious advertising so you can’t say he’s an idiot for that. He seemed pretty smart to me. He figured out what his dad was working on without much of an explanation and he modified the web shooters so theyd actually shoot the web instead of just spooling it out.
-
Bottom line the movie isn’t on the same level as movies like LOTR but it’s definitely worth seeing.
“He is Negative’s predecessor and (probably) his mentor.”
-
LMAO. Although I thought X on came in between Expert and Negative?
But other than that, I haven’t seen the movie yet so… yeah
“when are you gonna give us a magic mike review”
-
This.
How are you complaining about how he got his powers when that’s what happened?
That’s not the screenwriter’s fault, that’s Stan Lee’s fault.
I saw it and thoroughly enjoyed it. I loved spideys quips. I thought the charcters were great too. Although I wish the lizard had worn his lab coat more as the lizard and I was really surprised when they killed off captain Stacy.(spoiler) being a big fan of spidey, I’d have thought he’d live to be there when Gwen Stacy is killed in the sequel. Also, they left out curt Connors’ wife Martha and son billy. As for all the tiny lizards i figured they were connors’ or at least attracted to him. Overall, great movie. Really enjoyed it.
I still want to know if this was really the admin.
Wow, I almost took this review seriously.
Where’s Hitman ? He writes good reviews.
@Mnemosyne’s Grandson
You’ll find him in factpiletopia.com, actually.
The film was a lot better than the original trilogy, thats for damn sure
Here is a much fairer review for those of you that care:
-
The Spider-man origin story is one of the most popular and well known origins in comic history. It needed to be retold because the non-comic reading public got a bullshit version last trilogy.
-
The new cast is great. Andrew Garfield plays a great Peter Parker, and in all honesty Gwen Stacy was the best part of the movie. Without Gwen this movie probably would have sucked, but luckily Emma Stone did a stellar job of playing everyone’s favorite Spider-man love interest. Martin Sheen was born to play Uncle Ben! Except he never did say Uncle Bens most signature line… I understand it’s cliche but I kept waiting for him to say it, BUT HE NEVER DID!
-
The only part of the film that was bad was its villain, the absolutely retarded lizard. I feel he was only put in the film because they needed a classic Spider-Man villain, but through the entire movie I just wondered why he was there… If anything killed the film it was The Lizards pointlessness.
-
All in all, I can’t wait to see the sequel, but at the same time I have a horrible feeling of dread that they are going to kill off Gwen the same way they did in the comics, and if they do I will probably cry. Deeply and emotionally cry
I agree.
-
Gwen Stacey>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>Mary Jane. Multiply the amount of “greater thans” by ten, and that’s how much better Emma Stone is than Kirsten Dunst as well. Bleh. Stupid Kirsten Dunst.
Origin story? Didn’t the first Spider-Man movie show Peter becoming Spider-Man?
-
So….2 origin stories?
@Negative: Its called a reboot of a series. I’m sure you’ve heard of them before.
As for Dr. Lizard (Since when in the hell was he called simply ‘The Lizard’!?o.O) He was hit n miss in my opinion. They got his strength down, and I really liked how they made sure that even while he was a lizard that he didn’t lose any of his intelligence. ALSO, they included the split personality that was caused by his transformation.
Also, I give kudos to this version of the movies for actually having Spidey use Spider-Tactics. Was great seeing him *SPOILERS* cocoon/envelope Dr Lizard in webbing.
Also, this review just reads like someone got bullied to hell for liking Spider-Man so they hate him now.
admin normally goes out of his way to give us as vague of an opinion as possible. I have a hard time believing our lovable admin wrote this brain numbingly negative review…its like nostalgia critic’s inhumanely unfunny cousin
-
which reminds me does admin post reviews if you send them to him I was thinking of making on.
“its like nostalgia critic’s inhumanely unfunny cousin”
-
I never saw any of his cousin’s stuff.
@sorrow
-
as far as I know he doesn’t have an inhumanely unfunny cousin…I was just relating the negativity of this review the the usually comical nature of critic’s negativity
@Admin
I still want that magic mike review
“as far as I know he doesn’t have an inhumanely unfunny cousin…I was just relating the negativity of this review the the usually comical nature of critic’s negativity”
-
Ah just the way you worded it seemed to imply that he did.
I like how this new movie Spiderman doesn’t actually have natural web powers while the old movie Spiderman did.
-
I’m being sarcastic of course.
“I like how this new movie Spiderman doesn’t actually have natural web powers while the old movie Spiderman did.
-
I’m being sarcastic of course.”
Wait, what? You prefer Spiderman without his web-shooters? Why? He had em in the comics, and that’s why this movie went that direction.
“Wait, what? You prefer Spiderman without his web-shooters? Why? He had em in the comics, and that’s why this movie went that direction.”
Don’t read the comics.
-
I just think it’s weird……
-
“Does whatever a spider can!”………with a little help.
I don’t know. I thought it was weird that he would be able to shoot webs out of his wrists w/o them. Last I checked, spiders didn’t shoot webs out of their wrists.
““Does whatever a spider can!”………with a little help.”
lmfao
“I don’t know. I thought it was weird that he would be able to shoot webs out of his wrists w/o them. Last I checked, spiders didn’t shoot webs out of their wrists.”
==
Last I checked, spiders didn’t have wrists haha. Personally, I liked the idea of Spider-Man having organic web shooters, it seemed kinda stupid to give a guy spider powers, but no webs. I also don’t like the possibility of Spidey running out of webbing.
===
I just saw the movie today, and honestly, I really liked it. I thought it was gonna be crappy. The only problem I have is the version of the Lizard they used. I know the original Lizard was flat faced, but I would have liked to see the snout, but whatever. He looked like a scaley faced Hulk to me.
===
Also, people seem to forget that the Lizard can communicate (telepathically) with any reptiles within a mile radius, so that explains the lizards in the sewers.
===
All things considered, great movie IMO. Stone and Garfield were FANTASTIC together. Garfield made a great Peter, MUCH better than Tobey Bitch-Ass Maguire. Looking forward to the sequel. Mainly to find out (SPOILER) who the Man in the Shadows was. The director commented on him saying “Let’s just call him a representative of Oscorp.” So..yeah.
@the drifter
Pretty sure he’s always been called ‘the lizard’ smas the lizard, and dr.connors as a human. Hehh dr. Lizard.
ah hello to all of my Pilers. I just got done seeing The Amazing Spiderman. An the first thing I did was come here to read the “Admin” review because he had told me earlier in the week how boring it was to him… Well it was boring to him because he isn’t the audience the movie really is trying to target. The movie is going after the teenager and young kids audience. Who may have never seen spiderman. They know all of the fan boys will show up… Needless to say this review was just a rant. The Admin loves anything from Google and seeing Bing really upset him. Well Microsoft clearly paid sony some cash and Sony loves cash so they clearly used Bing. GET OVER IT! I am going to follow up this post with a REAL REVIEW OF THE MOVIE from a true fan of spiderman. As I have been a fan of spiderman since I was a little kid… be on the look out for my review. Because it won’t suck like this one..
Winner: No one because of this lame review.. please stop writing rant reviews.. no one likes them.
” be on the look out for my review. Because it won’t suck ”
lol this is comeing from expert
Huh so it really was admin…
Piss Off!
:O *Gasp* Why do you say such hurtful things?!
am i the only one who dosnt have any complaints about this review
I will also wait for “Expert’s” review for his hard-on love affair with Spidey.
–
Then we’ll see who is “ranting” and who is “reviewing”.
I swear if JK Simmons doesn’t return as Jonah I’m ragequitting Spider-Man films…
@Geek Lord, HELL YEAH JK should be JJ! It was, like a match made in heaven!
-
@Negative, he didn’t get the full extent of his powers immediately after being bit. It took a good while for him to evolve further down the road of whatever he is. So after a few yrs past this movie he’ll eventually mutate the web slits on his wrist(The back of neck scene was foreshadowing this) And then he’ll eventually grow stingers.
-
Admin. No offense, but aren’t we a little butt hurt over this movie n the bing crap? Ignore it lol. Cuz he wouldn’t just go to a Library :rolls eyes:
I actually had two kids(about 17-20, and I’, late 20′s, so they’re kids) complain about the webshooters, calling them “stupid watches” and saying that that was “the end of the movie for me.” Obviously they’ve never read a single comic, or watched the cartoons(I grew up on the 90′s one, with that crazy synth voice and mock-3D opening sequence) or they would have known that. as drifter said, he DID NOT start out shooting web out of his wrists(in the 90′s toon, i think it didn’t happen until the Manspider Arc). I liked this movie a lot. Andrew Garfield was excellent, portraying all Peter’s emotional damage, as well as Spidey’s overwhelming cocksureness almost perfectly.
TL;DR ignore admin’s “butthurt over Bing” rant, go see the movie.
and by had two kids, i mean they sat near me in the theater, they weren’t mine.
I couldn’t stomach the Tobey Maguire Spiderman Movies xD I have no idea who’s in the new ones…
Finally got to see the movie, loved it, and I agree Garfield, and Stone >>>>>>Maguire, and Dunst. The thing with the Captian Stacy dying, happened to him in the comics also, and well before Gwen was killed.
The others were better.
BEFORE I CONSIDER THIS….is Bruce Campbell in this?
Stellar casting choice for Spidey and Gwen I think. Uncle Ben was fantastic as well.
-
The Lizard was definitely a weak point; his face heel turn from Altruist to ecoterrorist was too quick for me to soak in.
-
*Spoilers*
However, their subtle introduction to the guy who will eventually bond with the Symbiote and become the iconic Venom, by showing his unstable, highly violent tendences; that excites me.
-
The post credits sequence was intriguing as well as frustratingly vague.