Suggested by EnigmaJ
A strange virus emerged on Skull island and swept across it. This virus caused all of its inhabitants to, human and beast, to turn into savage zombies, attacking everything and anything they see ( except anybody who’s already been zombified ).
It is at this time, by coincidence, a number of Triremes crash onto the coast of one side of the island. On board, Leonidas and 300 Spartans. On the other side of the Island, Jack Sparrow and his crew on board the HMS Interceptor decided to dock on this strange island.
The Spartans begin heading inland as they have no supplies to survive very long on the island. 300 Spartans Warriors soon find themselves surrounded by heavy jungles. Sparrow and his crew remain by the coast, onboard their ship. Sensing the disturbance on the island, hordes of zombie beasts begin heading towards both locations.
Human Zombies ( Wave One ): 25 fast moving Zombie Natives.
Insect Zombies ( Wave Two ): This wave attacks about half an hour after the initial wave, giving each group time to think about their next move. 50 Insects ahead towards both groups location. This group comprises of a mix of zombie bug-beasts ( giant spiders, giant centipedes, arachno-claw etc. )
Dino Zombies ( Wave Three ): There is an hour preparation for this attack. 15 Venatosaurus and 1 Brontosaur
Revived Zombies ( Wave Four ): This wave occurs only five minutes after the previous. Everyone who has died so far come back as zombies to attack their own respective groups.
Ape Zombie ( Wave Five ): This wave begins after half an hour. A zombified Ape giant ( Kong ) heads towards each groups location.
*If both groups are still alive, waves will cycle through over again ( this time with twice as much zombies from before ).
Note: Neither group actually has to engage and kill every zombie in each wave, They merely have to survive it.
Which group survives the longest?
September 11, 2009
#1
hang on havn’t we settled this?? THE PARROT IS PART OF THE CREW. the parrot can fly, the parrot is small and probably quite hard to hit, he can fly higher then monkey boy, and so can the little monkey (not from flying). well mabye not the monkey. He was always my favourite character from the trilogy.
September 11, 2009
#2
@chewie, the monkey isnt part of the crew and even if he was he would most likely have been bit in round 1… then the monkey would have killed the parrot in round 4…
the bottom line is the only thing(minus monkey scenario above) that would be likely to kill the parrot is the bronto with a quick bite
September 11, 2009
#3
Flying bugs eat tiny parrot.
September 11, 2009
#4
no flying bugs…
September 11, 2009
#5
this has to be the most idiotic way of determining a match, but I can’t help from laughing.
Although what if the parrot inadvertently flew to the spartans and then got speared? lol..
September 11, 2009
#6
How do you have a bunch of giant insects while leaving out all the flyers?
Anyway, there are still the webs of the giant spider.
September 11, 2009
#7
@ Everyone
The Parrot is based on the coat, IT CAN FUCKING FLY, many islands have rock outcroppings a couple hundred feet from the coast.
- Parrot Flys to rock out cropping after the pirates die and waits til the Spartans are killed by Zombie Kong and guess what?????
PIRATES WIN MOTHA FUCKAAAA !!!!!
September 11, 2009
#8
@ Belisaur, well, since admin listed only land based insects before for he put etc, we are to assume no flying ones were included, also i dont think zombie bugs would build a web during an “assualt” I wrote the outcome, doesnt mean i like it
September 11, 2009
#9
aww it’s a shame the monkeys not included-I liked him. but still… why are we arguing this? it can fly… as soon as the first zombie was seen the parrot legs it (fly’s it) to a rocky outcrop several hundred feet up. There he waits and watches till Kong shows up. Kong looks up sees a parrot and decides that ITS A FREAKING PARROT and that it has nothing to do with him and the pirates. King Kong kills the pirates and the Spartans leaving the parrot on the rocky outcrop to ponder what happened to its master.
September 11, 2009
#10
I leave for a few days and come back to this. I guess this match will be decided if animals count as members of the crew? How I love Factpile……..
September 11, 2009
#11
@ Pondering Fool
Outcome- PARROT WINS !!!!!!
September 11, 2009
#12
@Kenny C.
I don’t even think the Parrot needs a team hahaha. The match should be now “Pirates, Spartans, and Parrot”. Live on Parrot and be the last to succumb to the brain-eating zombies!
- pondering fool
September 11, 2009
#13
They don’t need to make a web, they’re on home ground. It would be weird if there wasn’t webs dangling from the trees.
September 11, 2009
#14
@ Belisauris
Pirates on coast
Parrot with Pirates
Coast = no trees
no trees = no webs
September 11, 2009
#15
Then the bugs will camp out on the coast (most insects have trouble with water) and wait until the parrot drops into the sea out of exhaustion.
Most birds have trouble with water and parrots are not ducks.
September 11, 2009
#16
@Pondering Fool
““Pirates, Spartans, and Parrot”. Live on Parrot ”
My thoughts as well haha and oh I like your new look
September 11, 2009
#17
@ Beli
DID YOU EVEN FUCKING READ POST 207 !
September 11, 2009
#18
I only hope the parrot doesn’t return to it’s undead master once everyones dead… Meh, it will be the last one standing, ‘ahem’ flying anyway. Iago for the win motha f***a!!!
September 12, 2009
#19
@ Megaraptor18
“My thoughts as well haha and oh I like your new look”
Great minds think alot, or so they say. And thanks for the compliment mate. Finally decided to get a gravatar, though I miss my wierd pink face I had before…..
-pondering fool, with a new look.
September 12, 2009
#20
@Kenny C.
Yes, and I wonder why it even factors in as insects could easily pursue the parrot to any stone outcrop on the island.
September 12, 2009
#21
@ Beli
Man… just give the fuck up already… you LOSE.
September 12, 2009
#22
@Kenny C.
Do I?
At least my argument relies on something more solid than a parrot.
I’d say that you’ve lost several times over by now.
September 12, 2009
#23
@ Beli
But, we stated that the insects don’t fly and even if they did, before they could even get to the parrot the Spartans would be dead by Kong.
September 12, 2009
#24
There are fifty insects and no flyers was an assumption. Parrots are not the most agile or quickest of birds. It’s not going to live beyond the first wave.
September 12, 2009
#25
@Beli
Your assumption is just as full of conjecture as mine so you can’t say for certainty.
We have already established sir that the pirates would survive at least the first two waves, therefore the bugs are removed from the equation and you lose.
September 12, 2009
#26
Spartans also lasted longer than two waves as well.
September 12, 2009
#27
Spartans are notoriusly tenacious and as the scenario progresses, the spartan’s casualty rates drop.
Also, without flyers, the spartans would take scant casualties from that wave.
As for Kong, all you need is one good throw through the eye.
September 12, 2009
#28
@ Beli and Mega
IT DOESN’T FUCKING MATTER, GODDAMN IT!
Beli, do I need a fucking diamond tipped drill to get through that thick skull of yours?
The Spartans will DIE before the Parrot, THE FUCKING CONCLUSION – Pirates WIN !
September 12, 2009
#29
@ Kenny
Why so serious? Would like to see a magic trick.
September 13, 2009
#30
@ Kenny C.
Cool,I’ll be the pencil guy, you be the volunteer.
September 13, 2009
#31
Pencils? you need to watch pencil face.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4MjTb5A68VA
September 13, 2009
#32
@Kenny C
I could say the same about you.
But alas, you lose your temper far too quickly and this affects your thoughts negatively.
September 13, 2009
#33
@ Draco
WTF that was the creepiest shit I have ever seen
September 13, 2009
#34
I know right?! Stumble upon bizarre oddities section. Not sure why I went there…
September 13, 2009
#35
@ Draco
Thanks to you, I have something else that will haunt my dreams beside Pennywise, Jaws, agent Smith, and the Dark is Rising.
September 13, 2009
#36
@ Beli
I still win though. So… FACE!
September 13, 2009
#37
twas the point. Eater of worlds. AND OF CHILDREN!
pennywise really isn’t that scary.
September 13, 2009
#38
@Kenny C
No, no, I win.
Atleast until you can come up with an argument against it.
September 13, 2009
#39
@ Beli and Kenny
Everybody knows that the Zombies won HAHAHAHAH
September 13, 2009
#40
pulls out VNS Chain Scylla.
Takes aim at Beli and Kenny,
I Will do it!
September 13, 2009
#41
Megaraptor pulls out a VC-5 Arc Rifle and also takes aim at Beli and Kenny.
I will do it for you if need be Autarch Dracosphinx.
September 13, 2009
#42
Hold… I’ll deal with these two myself.
Didn’t I kill ALL of you yet?
September 13, 2009
#43
Yes Autarch Dracosphinx I shall hold
September 13, 2009
#44
cut them off. Make no mistakes This time. That Sergeant killed most of you last time.
Make sure, that it does not happen again.
September 13, 2009
#45
Belisaurius calls in a Bolo mk XXX
I’d put those away if I were you…
September 13, 2009
#46
@ Kenny
Well…. FUCK IT.
/ Flips head of the Might Pimp Cane of Khrone and hits the red button/
I suggest that you run now…. I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT THIS DOES!!!! HAAHAAHAA.
September 13, 2009
#47
@ Beli
No I win, I have presented the case on how the pirates will win viva the Parrot and all you’re doing is going.
“Na-uh, the sPartens are rapez the piratz!!!! NOOBB.”
September 13, 2009
#48
@Kenny C
I don’t know weather to call this Argumentum ad Nauseum, or refusal to acknowledge fallacy.
My point is that the bugs can kill the parrot. You argue that the bugs have no flyers. I claim this assumption is unlikely and that the spiders have webs in the jungles and the bugs can chase the parrot down.
It is at this point you refuse to debate, which brings into question why you are here.
Also, I believe this is yours *hands back model rocket*.
September 13, 2009
#49
@ Beli
One- The Parrot is one the coast – That means no place to put webs.
Two – The bugs are started to have no flyer’s and even they did the Pirates beat the first two waves easily and that means… NO BUGS
Three – Kong will Kill the Spartans because how likely is it that you will hit a giant Gorilla in the eye when he’s killing you and your friends… in the fucking jungle where trees restrict your throw and aim?
Four – The Parrot fly to a rock when it sees the Pirates about to lose (as in Pirates 3) and goes to a rock outcropping,or a high tree, or a fucking mountain… it doesn’t matter, he just needs to stay alive til Kong owns the Spartans, which should be about an hour or less after the pirates all die.
September 13, 2009
#50
The bugs won’t kill the parrot-all it has to do is stand back while the pirates kill the bugs (as sapper outlines). Then when the pirates are killed by King Kong it fly’s away freely because all the bugs are dead ’till the next time they come back. By that time the Spartans will be dead giving pirates the victory. Oh and that’s my rocket. I can’t possibly think how it ended up in your back garden. *whistles*
September 13, 2009
#51
@ Beli
/ Hits Beli in the head with a baseball bat./
Do you get it yet? NO?
/ Hits Beli in the head with a metal rod./
Do you get it yet? No?
/ Hits Beli in the head with an axe./
DO YOU GET IT YET? NNOOOO?!!!
/ Readies Gorchild for the next strike along with a barrel full of striking weapons./
September 14, 2009
#52
/Draws Drach’nyen and parries Gorechild and follows through with a crisp repose that separates Kenny C’s hand from his arm./
No, I don’t get it.
/calls in fire support from the bolo to anihilate the barrel of weapons/
Because you stopped debating…
/Draws force short sword in the hand opposite Drach’nyen and proceeds to open a can of Niten Ichi-ryu upon Kenny C/
And simply proceeded to rant.
/Flays the chain of Gorechild with both blades/
Now listen
You ASSUME their are no flyers, there is no word for or against. It is also possible that the bug would pursue the parrot. With the number of bugs and no sanctuary in the trees, it’s only a matter of time before the parrot drops dead from exhaustion. Considering the humidity of the jungle and lack of updrafts, I’d say it has a couple hours tops.
As for the spartans, one spartan managed to score an eye shot on a charging rhino at about, say twenty yards at an oblique angle while the rhino was charging. Leonidas managed to put a spear through about an inch of rock. Kong’s large size forces him to fight in large spaces or create large spaces. His eyes are as big as a man’s torso and he’s not one for stealth. It is perfectly reasonable for a spartan to put a spear through Kong’s eye.
@Chewie6000
…I thought this was your garden…
September 14, 2009
#53
“/ Readies Gorchild for the next strike along with a barrel full of striking weapons./”
BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD!
/Takes Gorechild and Khorne puts back the Mica dragon teeth/
/Hits Kenny over the head with the handle of Gorechild/
“Stick with the Cane!”
/Runs off and proceeds to kill many imperial guardsmen via hacking through thier chests/
September 14, 2009
#54
Belisaur dont get it… the parrot would be last to die, thus, the outcome would be for the pirates… its a technicality… you know a lawyer thing… its not like the spartans were less of warriors than the pirates, quite the contrary, but the fact remains that the parrot would survive past round 5. and probably not die until round 7 or 9. either by insect or bronto chomp…
::Pulls out his XM1030 S.P.E.A.R.
http://factpile.wikispaces.com/Other+-+Fiction
:: Ballistics baby, come get some.
September 14, 2009
#55
@ Beli
” You ASSUME their are no flyers, there is no word for or against. It is also possible that the bug would pursue the parrot. With the number of bugs and no sanctuary in the trees, it’s only a matter of time before the parrot drops dead from exhaustion. Considering the humidity of the jungle and lack of updrafts, I’d say it has a couple hours tops. ”
- What don’t you understand about rock outcroppings outside the perimeter of the island you dumbass ?
” As for the spartans, one spartan managed to score an eye shot on a charging rhino at about, say twenty yards at an oblique angle while the rhino was charging. Leonidas managed to put a spear through about an inch of rock. Kong’s large size forces him to fight in large spaces or create large spaces. His eyes are as big as a man’s torso and he’s not one for stealth. It is perfectly reasonable for a spartan to put a spear through Kong’s eye. ”
- One, this was with a clear view of the monster and nothing obstructing his view or his spear. Kong’s in a fucking jungle and there are trees obstructing the Spartans
- Two, Kong is going to be moving constantly, not exactly easy to get the eye.
- Three, Kong’s eye would stop the spear going all the way to the brain.
- Four, your arguments are really stupid and show how you don’t even read other’s posts.
September 14, 2009
#56
Pirates…. well, Parrot wins!
September 14, 2009
#57
a man of mystery……a believer……a follower…..a fighter…..for all Parrot-Kind…..ladies and gentlement, i present to you…..Kenny C.!!!
- pondering fool
September 14, 2009
#58
@ Pondering Fool
YAAAAA… do I get a title, or medal, or something!
September 14, 2009
#59
@Kenny C.
Depends. You get a new-pimp cane or……..wait, why would u want something other than a new pimp cane?
/hands over new pimp cane (with new Halo-fanboy killing feature)/
Have fun my friend….mwuhahahahaha, I have unleashed a monster!
- pondering fool
September 14, 2009
#60
“Have fun my friend….mwuhahahahaha, I have unleashed a monster!
- pondering fool”
What have you done millions of Halo fanboys will die now. Wait a second… that might not be a bad thing.
September 14, 2009
#61
@Megaraptor18
Who knows, history might shine upon this moment mate.
- pondering fool
September 14, 2009
#62
@ Pondering Fool
Mmmmmm…
/ Sees red button on handle on new pimp-cane/
I wonder what this does?
/ Pushes red button and hole in universe opens up/
Uh-oh.
/ Kenny is sucked in and screams are soon heard./
September 14, 2009
#63
Your right as of this moment history has changed. But is it for the better or for the worse
September 14, 2009
#64
/ Kenny returns twenty minutes later from the hole. He lost his right arm, his cap, has a large gash on his chest, a bullet hole in his left knee cap, but has his pimp cane at ready… there’s blood on it. /
You have no idea what the hell just happened to me.
/ Looks at right arm stump./
Great. JUST GREAT! Right after the Vodka bottle injury, I lose an arm.
September 14, 2009
#65
I would tell you how I got Bonic body parts but I was wasted when I became Mega
September 15, 2009
#66
Wait, so their are no flyers yet convieniently place rock outcropping just out of the reach of bugs? Come on, your modding the scenario to your own designs.
There is no evidence that this island doesn’t have beaches all around. Considering that there are dinosaurs on the island, I’d say its old enough that any outcropping has long since eroded to sand.
@Kenny C
Kong either hides behind the trees where he is no threat, or breaks cover into the oppen, where he can be hit.
Kong is not an evasive fighter by nature. It is not the nature of gorillas to stalk their prey. Gorillas are more of the intimidate to defend their territory type.
The bone behind the eye of a primate is eggshell thin. A spartan can throw a spear through an inch of solid rock. Pray tell WHY can’t a spartan put a spear through the eye of Kong? Even accounting for size, the back of the eyesocket is NO defence to a spear.
And finally, stop trying Argumentum Ad Hominem. I am not on trial here.
September 15, 2009
#67
” I’d say its old enough that any outcropping has long since eroded to sand. ” – In the Movie Kong the villagers used rock outcroppings to kidnap the lady in distress from the ship she was on.
” Gorillas are more of the intimidate to defend their territory type. ” – So? He is something the Spartans have NEVER faced and would just crush them with his fists.
“….or breaks cover into the oppen, where he can be hit.” – Remember those elephants in the movie? If the Spartans are so pin fucking point with their weapons, why didn’t they hit them in the eye? It didn’t seem that the spears to the gut were doing that much,and Kong’s skin is probably just as thick as theirs.From what I saw it’s not exactly in the Spartan rulebook and it seems they can only do it when a target is on level with them and is running straight at them with an open field of vision. Kong is going to be running around,is pretty fucking tall, in the jungle,and will be amongst them in a second.
- And even if they beat Kong (very fucking unlikly), the remaining Spartans have to face a wave of fifty fast zombies and another wave of incests before even the remote possibility of flying incest can bet close to the parrot.
” And finally, stop trying Argumentum Ad Hominem. I am not on trial here. ” – Ummm, yes you are.
You arguments are failure.
September 15, 2009
#68
If this is indeed Kong, then why Can’t he swat a parrot? All he needs is a tree to swing around, a tree and catch the thing with the branches. It wouldn’t be harder that swatting a particularly sluggish fly.
Meanwhile, a thrown spear is a well accepted tactic for bringing down lone beasts. It was not used against the elephants because their was more than one and they didn’t need to throw their spears to beat them.
Also, the Spartans held up against thousands of persian infantry. As Sun Zu said, numbers alone are no great advantage. The insects, not to be confused with sexual relations between kin, are not even a threat without flyers and the dinos can be taken down with the right tactics. The revived phase isn’t even an issue because greeks burn their dead.
Finally, No, we are not arguing my intelligence, we are debating over who will survive longer, a small band of pirates or three centuries of spartans. Anything else is expressly forbiden by the factpile debating rules.
September 15, 2009
#69
Ever wish you could go back and edit your posts?? I would so go back and edit this one. @Belisaur, shut up the parrot would outlast, I say so, and Skull island has rock croppings, (Its the island from king Kong, i usually hate insulting people but this is just for you) Dumbass… go back and read post 122
September 15, 2009
#70
The Pirates win because of a bird only in Factpile that would make sense
September 15, 2009
#71
@ Beli
” If this is indeed Kong, then why Can’t he swat a parrot? All he needs is a tree to swing around, a tree and catch the thing with the branches. It wouldn’t be harder that swatting a particularly sluggish fly. ” – HE’S ON A FUCKING OUTCROPPING YOU RETARD.
” Meanwhile, a thrown spear is a well accepted tactic for bringing down lone beasts. It was not used against the elephants because their was more than one and they didn’t need to throw their spears to beat them.” – Even you have to admit that this statement is so full of bullshit that Nixon would be impressed.
I’m beginning to think that either your skull is made of diamond or when you answer 2+2, you put SPARKLY.
September 15, 2009
#72
@Kenny C.
SPARKLY???? ROFLMAO epic….. truely epic….
September 15, 2009
#73
@Kenny C
Kong can swim and trees float, rock outcroping means nothing.
And my argument is still as valid as yours, much to your dismay.
September 15, 2009
#74
This turned into a flame war. Now no one will ever get the medal……
September 15, 2009
#75
@ Beli
” Kong can swim and trees float, rock outcroping means nothing. ” – Gorillas can’t swim you retard. And even if he does, you know what parrots can do? FLY YOU FRICKEN IDIOT!
” And my argument is still as valid as yours ” – Your argument is so full of holes that an 18 wheeler can drive through it. The Spartans can’t kill Kong. Kong can’t kill parrot, well… the Parrot will sure as hell out last the Spartans. Conclusion – Parrot Wins.
September 16, 2009
#76
Now, while they didn’t kill that elephant you have to remember that the one guy’s son in 300 easily brought down a rhino by throwing a spear…and we all know how thick a rhino’s skull is…
September 16, 2009
#77
Wow kenny… chill you are basing the entire Pirate’s victory on a parrot and you are being riled so. A silly zombie matchup involving silly pirates and over-the-top spartans should be taken as seriously as it is right now, let alone the actual thought of the parrot. I mean “zombie kong” lol…
anyway, knowing this parrot it would probably fly right up to the kong and say something stupid like
“KONG APPROACHING” or some other annoying thing and then get killed. It’s not like the parrot is going to immediately perch itself on some invented rock area just to survive for this particular match. It’s a stupid bird and would probably get itself killed.
*Sigh* now I am taking this too seriously I mean.. a zombie kong… and parrots lol!
September 16, 2009
#78
@ Baron
It was through the eye.
September 16, 2009
#79
@CPT Olimar,
I know right… when i played out the scenario in posts# 122, 123 the parrot was an after thought… if i had known it would have been that big of an issue 150 posts later… i would have killed it off waaaaaay earlier or not have included it at all…
September 16, 2009
#80
wait r the pirates the zombes or not?
September 17, 2009
#81
No, Hitman, the Pirates are the combatants.
September 18, 2009
#82
Bionic factpilers, zombie-Kongs, freaked out parrot…..how i love this thread.
- the pondering fool
September 21, 2009
#83
Parrot FTW woot woot…
September 25, 2009
#84
This is probably the most humorous thread I have ever read…..everything rest on the survival of a parrot….puchica…..
- the pondering fool
September 25, 2009
#85
“This is probably the most humorous thread I have ever read…..everything rest on the survival of a parrot….puchica…..”
If this thread doesn’t make Factpile History than nothing will.
September 25, 2009
#86
“If this thread doesn’t make Factpile History than nothing will.”
There should be a new thing to add to the Factpile award sections. “Most humorous”….ohh the calamity that would follow if such a thing existed, but it would be worth it if this thread got posted there.
- the pondering fool
September 25, 2009
#87
So, are he pirates so pathetic to have to rely on a parrot to win? So sad.
September 28, 2009
#88
As soon as someone can confirm that the parrot is a technical crewmember this battle goes to the pirates… until then
“THIS IS SPARTA!!!” HA OOO
September 28, 2009
#89
“As soon as someone can confirm that the parrot is a technical crewmember this battle goes to the pirates… until then
“THIS IS SPARTA!!!” HA OOO”
The Gauntlet has be thrown down (again). Waiting for Kenny C. and his pimp canes. Going to be quite a show mwuhahaha.
- the pondering fool
October 1, 2009
#90
The world will know that free men stood against a Zombie monkey, that few stood against many, and before this battle was over, even a Parrot can bleed.
October 25, 2009
#91
“The world will know that free men stood against a Zombie monkey, that few stood against many, and before this battle was over, even a Parrot can bleed.”
I don’t know how else you could summarize such a thread……everything hangs on the parrot……so epic!
- the pondering fool
January 26, 2010
#92
Parrots are smart enough to mimic something and retain it i dont see how it ouwl be NOT smart enough to go to a rock outcropping and sit there for 9 waves or so (Flying WAY/away up when its about to be pwned of course) but if the parrot is not a crew member then the Spartans win i guess (unless the pirates just take there boat and f^ck off but otherwise Spartans
January 26, 2010
#93
woops ouwl typo
lol would ouwl
January 28, 2010
#94
I got a jar of dirt and guess what is inside it!!!!!!!!!!!!
Anyway what if jack was still immortal?(from the curse)